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2000-09-11
16:56:52
i think i was a little too optimistic about my job hunt on friday. apparently, it wasn't a very good day for me to be out asking around for a job. every time i went into some sort of establishment, the place was so busy that the manager didn't have so much as a minute to even tell me what to do to apply for a job. i suppose it's understandable, seeing as how i am in a vacation spot. fridays aren't the best if you're looking for a manager with some free time on his hands.
i was so discouraged after daylight on friday that i just sat myself down at a bar in one of the restaurants i went in, and i drank myself silly. i have no idea how much i drank, but it must've been a lot. when i woke up saturday morning, i couldn't even remember the name of the place i had been. i didn't know how i had gotten home, either.
i suppose it's good that i finally managed to escape from everything for awhile. if i can't remember what happened, then it musn't have been bad, right? it always seems to be the bad memories that haunt you forever. the good ones can sometimes fade away with the passing of time, and you won't even realize you've forgotten them until someone tries to take you back to "the good ol' days." then you realize your pleasant memories are fractured at best and gone at worst.
i spent the first part of saturday trying to fight off a hangover. i was largely unsuccessful. it was partially the hope that i could cure my ailment with more booze and partially curiosity that eventually drove me back in the direction i thought i had gone friday until i found the same restaurant: the old steed. i sat at the bar once again, this time with the intention of having just a beer or two, but of course, that didn't happen.
after about two hours of drinking, the bartender approached me and started asking nosy but welcome questions: where was i from? why was i drinking alone? why was i at the same bar two nights in a row? where was my wife?...
i'm still in the habit of wearing my wedding band. i guess that should probably stop one of these days. i never intended to end my marriage by running out on jess. i love jess. really, i do. that's probably going to sound ridiculous by the end of this entry, but i will always love jess more than myself and the continuing saga of my life. the fact that i've been treating her like shit for the last few months has nothing to do with her; it's all because of me. i'm trying so hard to put things back together in my life. who knew how hard it would be?
i ended up getting blitzed again, but this time went a lot smoother. by the end up the night, the bartender had offered me a job, and i'd met a beautiful woman named kat.
it seems this woman had overheard tidbits of my conversation with the bartender. that, of course, meant that she overheard me talking about my marriage issues. she came over to sit by me, and offered her condolences in respect to my difficulties in marriage. eventually, she insisted on buying me a few drinks, and we ended up leaving together.
we came back to my hotel, and she immediately went into the bathroom to "freshen up." when she emerged, she was wearing nothing but a black lace teddy with black garters and stockings. she looked like a fantasy come to life. i couldn't believe it; i was instantly overcome with uncontrollable lust.
i won't disgrace her or anyone who may read this with details of our time together, but i will say that it was wonderful, and i have every intention of getting together with her again. she's one of the most beautiful women i've ever seen. she's probably about 5'8" with long, dark hair, and perfect breasts. she looks like she could be just slightly more than half my age, but i can't be sure how old she is. she's so innocent looking, but she's got an experienced touch and such confidence that it's easy to see even at first glance. and she's so soft.
most of yesterday was spent saying goodbye to kat and recovering from a long weekend of drinking. i'm still awaiting the call from the bartender at the old steed. he said he'd get in touch, but i should be able to start sometime this week.
i'm definitely beginning to feel as though i'm establishing myself into a new setting and an entirely new life. hopefully, this time i won't fuck it all up.
